Blessed Solitude
08 November 2010 at 12:53 pm

We had a cute little moment at Roy's, where I always have cute little moments with boys:

"Water?" asked the waiter.

"No ice," I said.

"Did you say no ice?" he asked.

"Yes, no ice," I said.

"I went surfing today and have water in my ear. No ice?"

I shook my head and did the international sign for cold, running my hands up and down my arms: "No ice."

"And for you, sir?"

"Sure, no ice."

The waiter returns after a few moments sets down two cups of mostly frozen water before scurrying away without a chance for us to comment.

Like we choreographed it, we watched the glasses be set down, looked at each other, back at the water, back at each other, shrugged, and laughed.

I focus so much on what I am not, that I focus so much on what others are not, that I forget to love what I am, what others are.

I need to remember the little moments: a mirthful mutual reaction to an oblivious waiter.

I had the weekend to myself. The boyfriend was out of town for a funeral. He wanted me to go, but I couldn't justify missing teacher training and work in order to endure meeting his mom for the first time at her late ex-husband's mother's funeral.

I gave him one of my free flights instead.

I can't be there for people emotionally, but I can provide financial support. That's just how I love: through gifts.

I sort of missed our little Saturday morning tradition of breakfast at the French cafe, but I really enjoyed taking in two yoga classes with no guilt, reorganizing my kitchen, and smoking pot with no one to complain about the smoke.

I am not enjoying the headache this morning from the bottle of wine I split with a box of cookies.

That's why I'm staying in the relationship.

I'm just so unhealthy when left to my own devices.


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About me
Hi. Morgan, 27, of Santa Barbara, CA. I am a hypocritical admirer of rhetoric (when it is my own) and an observer of literary trends. A secret: I don't take anything very seriously, and that includes myself.