Religion comes in handy
13 June 2006 at 9:55 am

I'm going to be honest: I prayed last night that I would wake up in time for my 8am exam. And my prayers were answered! Oh, but that God has a sense of humor:

The first time I woke up, I completely panicked, glanced at the windows to see how much light was coming in, and checked my cell phone/alarm/clock: it was 5:30am. Just to be safe, I double-checked the other clocks in the house. It was definitely 5:30am. I went back to sleep.

The next time I woke up was from a dream in which I had to clean out a toilet and "silver fish" lept out of it, but they were really gross and had legs. I lept out of bed completely grossed out and panicky, checked the windows -- it was pretty bright -- and checked my cell phone. It was 6:36am. I double-checked my alarm, briefly debated actually waking up, and fell back asleep.

The last time I woke up, my dream involved hearing the ice cream man coming and my trying to place the song that was playing. It was my alarm. It was 7:36am (exactly one hour later). I do not recall hitting the snooze (which requires some effort -- I have to open the phone and my eyes enough to read whether I'm hitting "Turn Off" or "Snooze"). I thought briefly, "Oh, thank God, I can still sleep." Then I thought, "JESUS CHRIST! I NEED TO BE AT SCHOOL IN 24 MINUTES." I lept out of bed, threw on the first thing I could find, shoved a toothbrush in my mouth, and hauled ass out the door. I made it to class with two minutes to spare.

Thanks, God!

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About me
Hi. Morgan, 27, of Santa Barbara, CA. I am a hypocritical admirer of rhetoric (when it is my own) and an observer of literary trends. A secret: I don't take anything very seriously, and that includes myself.