Highly Recommended
26 June 2005 at 8:21 pm

Dear Mr. Clean Original Magic Eraser Trial Size:

I must offer my most sincere apologies. During an erroneous trip to Target, I saw you as I was paying for my unnecessary but nonetheless low-priced items. I noticed you were only a dollar and thought I would give you a try, most positive that I was simply paying for an overly-squishy sponge and nothing more.

I forgot about you for a few days, but you reappeared (like magic!) as I was searching for a poo bag for my dog. I supposed I would give you a try. I read the instructions (instructions? For a sponge?). "Wet with water. GENTLY rub on surface." I took you to the door that has plagued my bleachwater mixture since I moved in: the front door, dirtied by fingertips and dog paws, made virtually indistinguisable by many a muddy shoe.

Nothing more than a sponge? How I scoff at my past self. Mr. Clean Original Magic Eraser Trial Size, I should have bought out Target's stock of your regular-sized self, for after one swipe I was blessed with a gift: the gift of cleanliness. My door? White as a virgin bride's dress. My heart? Swollen with love for you.

Please forgive me,
Morgan B____

P.S. I also bought 400 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets. Also highly recommended.

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About me
Hi. Morgan, 27, of Santa Barbara, CA. I am a hypocritical admirer of rhetoric (when it is my own) and an observer of literary trends. A secret: I don't take anything very seriously, and that includes myself.