kicked out!
gone!
not allowed to be here anymore!
...says my mom as she's collapsed on the floor sobbing because i'm here and not at my dad's.
she went through it with my brother, she says, and now she's going through it with me and SHE CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE DAMMIT! SHE DOESN'T HAVE THE ENERGY FOR THIS ANYMORE!
just leave, she says. she doesn't want to see me. SHE DOESN'T WANT TO SEE ME! JUST. LEAVE.
defeated. denied. dejected. i think i'm going to leave for seattle a few weeks early. what i'm going to do when i get up there ... i'll figure that out later.