so, i made it to student health but they decided to suck and i can't get an appt until next wednesday with dr. weiniger's replacement (he left for spring quarter...what kind of stability is that?) they gave me an emergency prescription, which will be filled tomorrow, which sucks because 3 days off anti-depressants is hell on your system. especially when life has already gone to shit.
so i went to longs and got my claritin prescription filled (i can't blame soggy eyes on allergies anymore) and then went downtown to hook up the "shop your way out of misery" theory. i managed to spend $236 at urban on some very cute things. now i can avoid laundry for at least another week :D. my daddy called while i was trying things on in the fitting room and we talked for a good 45 minutes. he said he woke up at 3:30a with a premonition about something happening to matt and me. then he woke up at 4:30a to an earthquake. hm. then i told him what's going on and he said that he thinks seattle would be good for me as well, but to not put all my eggs in one basket. well, too late for that. oh well.
fuck. i'm having money issues as well. if i don't think about it, it doesn't exist...erm...right? fuck fuck fuck. how did i go from a shitload of money to absolutely none? lksdjf;alksdjf;kl
i got ahold of the ever-marvelous cary, who, as always, made me feel marvelously better. i'm going to read for a bit and then call my brother. maybe i'll even hook up the cuppa noodles. i wish sanam was around. or paul and hasan, if they were high -- duh-esque? what? i like stealing other people's stories. because my life doesn't have nearly enough drama.
when i was talking to my dad, i said that i guess this is a good time to learn that i can't depend on anyone but myself and he said, no, you can depend on your mother, you can depend on me, and you might even be able to depend on your brother every once in a while. then he went on to say that one of his friends doesn't even have that; he's never met his father and his mother is a 'real' alcoholic. not like his type of alcolohism, but a hardcore, there-is-nothing-in-life-but-liquor alcoholic. had i not been in the fitting rooms at urban, i would have started sobbing. this is the first time he's ever verbally recognized his little problem.
<3 nofx:
//A PERFECT GOVERNMENT
Even if it's easy to be free
What's your definition of freedom?
And who the fuck are you, anyway?
Who the fuck are they?
Who the fuck am I to say?
What the fuck is really going on?
How did the cat get so fat?
Why does the family die?
Do you care why?
'Cause there hasn't been a sign
Of anything gettin' better in the ghetto
People's fed up
But when they get up
You point your fuckin' finger
You racist, you bigot
But that's not the problem
Now is it?
It's all about the money
Political power is takin
Protecting the rich denying the poor
Yeah, they love to watch the war from the White House
And I wonder how can they sleep at night?
How can they sleep at night?
How did the cat get so fat?//
but i think i'm going to go cry now because that sounds like a damn good idea.