MUST. RESIST. HOMICIDE.
04 October 2007 at 3:21 am

"Wow," I wonder innocently. "How did all these raspberry-colored splotches get onto everything in the kitchen? It couldn't be from my raspberry-enhanced smoothie, because I didn't spill any raspberries anywhere and the blender didn't explode while I was preparing my dinner. Oh, wait, I know--could it be my roommates, who killed the bottle of vodka I bought with the bottle of cranberry juice that belongs to me and only me that they succeeded in not only stealing, but in spilling absolutely everywhere they possibly could have, knowing I would be getting home at 3am and having to wake up at 7:30am to be at the courthouse at 8:30am and possibly not being too thrilled at the prospect of cleaning up their alcohol-induced mess? Yes. Yes, that must be it."

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About me
Hi. Morgan, 27, of Santa Barbara, CA. I am a hypocritical admirer of rhetoric (when it is my own) and an observer of literary trends. A secret: I don't take anything very seriously, and that includes myself.