Aaron's such a pussy
11 July 2006 at 12:39 am

Damien cornered a creature in the yard tonight. We thought maybe it was the kitty who makes his or her rounds throughout the neighborhood, and we figured Damien had chased him or her off long before we could do anything about it. Then Aaron decided to go check it out and said, "It's the gopher."

I immediately grabbed the shovel, fully intent upon disposing of it as inhumanely as it has so ruthlessly destroyed our yard, when Aaron said, "It's so scared! It's kind of ... cute?"

I went to look at it, weapon in hand, and it wasn't a gopher at all but a cute little disease-invested rat. I was still pretty set upon killing it -- "Do you want it to come inside and nibble on your ear while you sleep?" -- but Aaron had already made up a name for it (Jeffrey) as it hid behind a bedpost that has somehow made its way into the yard. I put on some dishwashing gloves, grabbed a few plastic bags, and slipped on my clogs in order to move it into the paradise that is our neighboring plot of land, when Aaron devised a plan to maneuver it into our neighbor's yard through the hole in the fence from whence it came. So we plotted a little course for it that would leave it no other path and poked it lightly with the shovel, and that rat is now out of our lives.

We applauded Damien's tracking abilities, I called Aaron a wimp, and he in turn told me that I'm a bloodthirsty, homicidal maniac.

And that was today.

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About me
Hi. Morgan, 27, of Santa Barbara, CA. I am a hypocritical admirer of rhetoric (when it is my own) and an observer of literary trends. A secret: I don't take anything very seriously, and that includes myself.