Jennifer says:
you guys are only friends right???
Morgan says:
yes! (( email from joanna: "i'm going to be the first to tell you you're being stupid. do i have to lock you in your room to keep him out of your life?" it's hard. it took all my strength to fall in love with him, i have nothing left to kick him out completely. he was calling to work out when we're going to see each other tomorrow since he gets his paycheck at 2
Jennifer says:
hmmm....
Morgan says:
i know i'm being stupid and weak and that it's all going to blow up in my face again, but if he is going to sober up, i want to be there to see why i fell for him in the first place
Jennifer says:
ok- i'll be the second one to saythat you are being stupid, but i won't try to lock you up
Jennifer says:
there are so many great guys out there that don't cheat, drink, and who have money!!
Jennifer says:
oh did i say good looking too?
Morgan says:
where are they?
Jennifer says:
i know a few... but most of them are more near thirty than 20
Jennifer says:
i have this great friend, Ty you two would really be good together, but i think he's too old for you
Morgan says:
yeah, i don't want any older boys. actually, i don't know what i want. i want to move away and start a new life and forget about this one.
Jennifer says:
that i can understand!
Jennifer says:
when i was nineteen, and just starting to get serious with oliver i think i was dating four guys at once...
Morgan says:
you playette
Jennifer says:
heheh
Jennifer says:
i of course dumped them all
Morgan says:
and lived happily ever after
Jennifer says:
it's more fun to see lots of people than to get worked up over one- and heart broken too
Morgan says:
i spent such a long time being lonely and sad that if i can wake up in the morning and smile, i'll do anything to hold onto whatever's making me smile.
Jennifer says:
oh... i hate to sound like an older sister, but i know exactly what you mean
Jennifer says:
don't forget he's also made you cry
Morgan says:
but he's also the one that made me feel better. i dunno, maybe i'm just waiting for closure. i told him, i can be your friend and i can help you through this, but you're going to have to watch me date and fall in love with other people and you have to let me do that.
i beat him up yesterday. fists, headbutts, kicking, the works. i am a damn good fighter, for a girl. he's swollen today. i told him he had to tell all his coworkers what happened. what's more humbling than, "my ex-girlfriend beat me up"?
it made me feel better.
he read all the stuff from here from the past 5 months and cried the entire night away while i slept and dreamt of anxiety attacks.
the only way to get away from this is to move away. i assure you.