girlie issues
27 June 2002 at 5:08 am

letter to sarah, on the offchance she still reads this:

finished /wasted/ tonight. horridly disturbed. hands went numb during bits of it and cringed at thoughts of what mayra put herself through, what you put yourself through, what i put myself through.

i'm extremely proud of you for coming out of it by yourself. am amazed you did so. am proud you are able to maintain a healthy weight, even if not a healthy image of yourself. there is no question in my mind that it's better to be of a healthy weight (even if, by society's standards, abnormal) and able to run miles than so thin that you cannot get out of bed without getting dizzy. that picture of you -- you know which one i'm talking about -- still haunts me and i worry about your eating habits, especially after talking with stine about her new diet. obviously, this is not something you ever really get over.

i'm sorry you went/are goin through this. while it is something you did to yourself, it is certainly not without distinct outside influences and i'm not sure it's something you could have helped because it's a mania, even if it's a developed mania. while we certainly will never live in a society in which body image is not top priority, we certainly don't have to fall prey to such image distortion. i'll always be here if you need to vent about stupid boys and stupid girls (no, you AREN'T fat, now shut up) and when you feel yourself slipping i want you to contact me, not so i can tell you it's wrong, slap-on-the-hand, stop it, but so i can say i understand and i care about you, not about how you look, and nothing will change that.

i'm probably being slightly melodramatic (drama queen? moi?), but i know how much i appreciate people worrying about me (well, something like that), so know that i'm thinking about you.

in other news, i have horrid cramps.

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About me
Hi. Morgan, 27, of Santa Barbara, CA. I am a hypocritical admirer of rhetoric (when it is my own) and an observer of literary trends. A secret: I don't take anything very seriously, and that includes myself.